Hans Gruber and The Die Hards, of Austin Texas, just released their latest record “With a Vengeance” on Ska Punk International. You can find this album on all streaming services.


Mustard had the pleasure of being able to experience this album early. Other condiments sat on the shelf with Mustard, such as Mayonnaise, became annoyed that this is all Mustard has listened too. But understandably so. Released by Ska Punk International, “With a Vengeance” goes full throttle making the Toretto family from the Fast and the Furious franchise consider new career options.

“With a Vengeance” opens up with the three lead singles “Nothing Like A Good Old Fashioned Witch Hunt”, “No No Bronto”, and “My Friend Chuck.” Everything Mustard thought they knew about dinosaurs was wrong. The photographs, the fossils collected in Animal Crossing: New Horizon, and the films depicting dinosaurs have all been a ruse.

The momentum continues on “Vrill Society” that brings down all systems in typical Illuminati fashion. Once again, Mustard begins to question everything they thought they knew. Is human existence and the systems in place all fabricated to distract us from The Queens plans? It would explain “No Outside Tanks” as they could disrupt and cause further chaos, fear, and destruction.

As the album progresses, Hans Gruber and The Die Hards make you begin to question time and all the lessons humans have “learned” in “Time, I Don’t Want It Anymore.” Mustard’s human intern is very punctual and often becomes anxious when they do not arrive to places “on time.” They are still pondering the lyrics of this track. We are then led to wonder how “Blood on the walls” appeared. Is it of The Queen’s doing? Or Chuck, who fought in Vietnam? To escape from the blood on the walls listeners must return to “Brazil” to feel the flames of love.

The next track on the album is probably Mustard’s favorite, “Let’s Drive Everywhere” which brings up the ongoing and current issue of Climate Change. Humans have caused (and will unfortunately still continue to cause) destruction to this planet. This is an issue Mustard’s human intern cares deeply about. The lyrics on this track are satirical yet haunting as some humans do think this way and without any empathy or remorse. Additionally, do not worry about the elderly as they explain in “An Old Man Like Me” that their body is fine while they observe those in their 20s, 30s, and 40s, getting drunk. Without stopping, listeners hear and told are about the “Monster of Walgren Lake.” Do we take them for their word? Or is it simply hysteria and mass delusion? That is for the listener to decide.

We begin to approach the end of “With A Vengeance” with “Credit Cards Are a Product of Satan” which Mustard believes to be a fact. Do not succumb and fall victim to predatory lenders. They will drain you dry much like your hair of its nutrients in “Dandruff” caused by ghosts (or demons according to the priest in the track.) That is not all though as we warned in the next track “You’re Being Watched” by what humans believe to be insects, but are they?

As we near the finish of the album, Hans Gruber and The Die Hards, along with Adam Davis bring us the workout anthem of the year – “Squatcore.” All gyms across the world should use this song when teaching and instructing humans to do a squat. After this is done it is important that listeners “Praise The Algorithm” and hope it brings about the likes and validations humans seek in our modern society.

If this is your first Hans Gruber and The Die Hards album Mustard hopes you stay around and listen to their previous work. Your ears will be grateful and appreciative that you did.

Mustard gives this album 5/5 condiment bottles.

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